Monthly Archives: June 2015

Of Emotional Blackmail


A wise man once told me, “Never change a winning formula”. I am glad to say, he is right. But not when it comes to Football Manager, your winning formula sometimes gets you trashed at home by a small club. After my last post, some were glad I was back, some liked the idea of the post as I have not written that way before. Long story short, I am sticking with that style again this week. Enjoy.

Emotional blackmail irks me a lot. It is simply a ploy to eat your cake and have it. I love God and I love to be in his presence. However, I do not appreciate it when a man of God who has managed time poorly says “No amount of time we spend in God’s presence is too much.” No Sir! I could not disagree more. Who said the four walls of a man-made building is the only place we are in God’s presence? Why would you disrespect time and want your congregation to pay for it just to fit in all you have planned for the day? If they are all important, you would have planned better. The God you serve is a stickler for time. He does not even joke around with it. Follow his example and stop blaming principalities and powers when church members leave your church because of your time-wasting antics.

Today’s world is fast paced. We want things done fast because we have other things that require our attention. It is why we want our downloads to run at 3.5mbps. This fast pace is also mirrored in the work place and personal life. We get busy. In all of this busy, we tend to lose track of things, however, being busy is no justification for having unopened notifications, emails, chats and so on. Those unopened notifications as much as you want to convince yourself are because you are busy, is a big fat lie. If anything, it shows just how uninformed, unorganised, and rude you are. The average person gets at least one hour a day to their self, in this time it is possible to select all those email and mark as read. We get that not every one who sends you a chat is ready for a serious talk, but at least have some courtesy, reply the message and let them know you are busy. Replying after six hours to give the illusion/reality of being busy is simply rude.

Every adult has a memory of what their childhood was like. For me, it was filled with beatings from mum and scoldings from dad. In case it is not obvious, I was a stubborn child. Spare the rod and spoil the child is the saying that justifies all the beatings we got as kids. However, the average Nigerian parent believes “the rod” refers to koboko, pankere, omorogun, belt and the likes. “The rod” is also those moments when you sit your child down and explain the ramifications of their actions. I know every child is different, but for me the scoldings worked better than the beatings. After all, the beating would end. But for scolding, you get sober and you actually understand why your action was wrong. Long story short, it is not every time you should beat your child like a thief at Oshodi market, sometimes talk to them like adults. You will be amazed at how effective it is.

Cake. I love cake. I think sponge cake is the only cake I have a problem with. Every corner today (on Instagram) you have a baker. Cakes ‘n’ Cream, Cookiejar, Nuts about Cakes and their likes have made it easier to surprise loved ones with cakes on that special occasion. Cakes are even delivered at your doorstep. All of this is good, but I feel for the children of the 21st century. Why? Good question. They will probably never know what it is to fight with your friends or siblings for the bowl used for cake batter. They will not understand the struggle to your mum out of the kitchen just to have a taste, and of course, they will miss the stomach ache that sometimes comes with having too much of the cake batter. They do not get to be excited when that cake batter is poured into the baking pan and tucked away neatly in the oven. Forget all these rants, all that matters is the final product.

Do you have any childhood memories you want to share or you have your different/similar opinions to the ones expressed above, do use the comment box.

In conclusion, have a great weekend! Cheers.


Posted by on June 26, 2015 in Rants


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Yes, it has been a while since I posted anything. I can give you a number of excuses, but I would stick to one. I just did not want to write. That is not to say there were not things to write about, I just did not want to. Now that we’ve cleared that, let’s dive into today’s post.

I have absolutely no idea what I plan on writing. I picked up my pencil (I love writing with pencil), and scribbled down some things. I love to write down before typing. This post might make sense to you or not, but make whatever you would of it. Here we go…

I have what I would call a short attention span. I am fickle. Very fickle. My tweets are a testimony of how fickle I am. There are so many thoughts in my head, I sometimes do  not finish with one thought before jumping to another. Like every other thing in life, it has its advantages. One of such is, I find it easy to forget about things because I have too many thoughts. It is one of the reasons why I do not know how to keep a grudge.

The average Nigerian has a problem. Yes, I know, we all have problems. This problem I speak of is actually one that we see from top to bottom. It is the sense of entitlement. The mentality that someone owes you something. Fun fact, NO ONE OWES YOU SHIT! The most guilty set of people with sense of entitlement are security guards. We understand that your employer pays you peanut to cater for your family (which in most cases consists of 1 wife and 8 children). We also understand that you see people around you with a better standard of living and you are aspiring to it. But, why in God’s name should I be the one to bear the brunt of your aspirations? Why do I have to pay you for doing a job you are already being paid for?

I have just considered ripping off the page I am writing on. I am starting to come off as harsh.

As much as I hate to say this, I am not sure I understand what feminism is all about. Here is why: How can a movement meant to educate people on the “evils” of gender inequality be so disorganised. Feminism is not philosophy that we can say it is has different schools of thought, it is a social construct. Why is there no acceptable standard for feminism? Why are there factions? Why are most people only feminist when it works to their advantage? You do not see a man only being a man when it is convenient. The behaviour of being a conditional feminist reflects poorly on the people who actually understand the cause of feminism. By the way, I keep telling people that not only women can be regarded as feminists, but of course, not every woman who is a feminist agrees to that. Do not even get me started on e-feminists.

The world’s plan to eradicate poverty is an admirable one. It is also one that looks doable based on the plans bodies like the UN, UNICEF, and other acronyms have planned out. I am not going biblical on this case, but even in the bible, there were always poor people. The bible only referred to them as needy. It is my first evidence in saying poverty cannot be totally eradicated. My second evidence, poverty is more mental than physical. If the average man cannot see beyond his nose or aspire beyond the limitations his background and environment has set for him, no amount of handouts, aids or loans can rescue him from the clutches of poverty.

The worst set of people after those who ask “Is it not just football?” (No, it is not) are those who tell emotional stories to blackmail the audience to back them during talent shows. We understand that the emotional appeal will help improve the ratings of the show, but come on, it is a talent show not a Lets-See-Who-Has-The Saddest-Story show. Let the millions of people judge you based on your talent and not because they feel pity for you. You might say the end justifies the means but how would you feel if a colleague at work is promoted because he lost his father over you who has actually outperformed him in every aspect. It is daylight robbery when someone who is talented actually loses out to a less-talented fellow with a sad story.

I have imagined myself several times playing for Manchester United (the best club in the world). I have imagined after we (Yes, WE) have lost a match how I would come on as a super sub to rescue the match. I hate losing. I do agree that a man might be able to change his wife, but he can never change his football club. There is just something inexplicable about the blind devotion one has towards his favourite football club.

In conclusion, I do hope you have enjoyed this. It is not possible for you to have the same opinion as I do. If you have contrary opinions or you just want to bare your mind, feel free to use the comment section. Obrigado.


Posted by on June 18, 2015 in Uncategorized